tbl 15

So I’m working at a restaurant in the Virginia-Highlands section of midtown Atlanta. Generally a decent set of customers, most are very friendly and I even get a lot of industry types, so dinner service is usually a breeze. But hey, you’ll get weirdos anywhere, and it’s to be expected. Which brings us to the woman who inspired the title of this blog – the crazy lady who sat @ table 15.

At first I thought she was simply an eccentric novelist, as she kept scribbling lines of some shit into a legal pad over the course of her meal. And she ordered five glasses of wine instead of simply ordering a bottle. I figure, though, I’ve seen worse and she can’t be all that bad.

I do table visit after table visit, and she confirms that everything is OK. Which is fine, except the night had been dreadfully slow and she seemed determined to camp out. After awhile, I get cut and wander around the resto, my sidework done and my tummy yearning to do a mind eraser and un-tuck my shirt.

The clock strikes 11 and I say ‘fuck it, I’m gonna drop the check @ her table and she’s gonna pay and I’m gonna pay someone to bus that table and go home.’ I stroll to the POS, print the ticket, put it inside a check presenter and walk to her table.

She’s gone.

Now, restaurant walkouts are more the exception than the rule, but they happen. How they get sorted out varies by store. Some gracious managers will void the whole check for you, the less-so will only give you your employee discount (50%) and the serious dicks will make you pay the whole check. Generally, though, a server can count on coming out-of-pocket on most of their walkouts.

So this bitch just cost me $60 on a $40 night. Great.

Fast-forward to last week when I come in for dinner service. I walk through the dining room to see if my colleague needs any help setting up. I get to the front of the resto and sure enough, who’s at table 15? Yup, she is. So I ask the girl who’s still on from day shift to pull up her check and sure enough, 5 glasses of white wine and an order of mussels. I tell her the deal and she takes up a watch on the woman from the host stand. Luckily, the MOD (manager on duty) was the same mgr who was working with me when she first walked out.

After a while, my friend who was on watch decides to strategically walk away, to see how the woman reacts. Her and the hostess both go to do something else, and sure enough crazy lady tries to walk out, except this time she’s cornered by my mgr. She gives some story about how her friend was supposed to meet her and it was going to be a celebration…whatever; who the fuck has a ‘celebration’ with a ‘friend’ but orders 5 glasses of wine waiting for her?

So, I personally call the cops.

She remains seated for a bit, as we all are on a rotating watch at this point. But don’t you know, she gets the itch after awhile and just walks out of the dining room, against the protests of our hostess. Just so happens, though, that the minute she walks out the cops are walking in. She gets about a half block up the street and the cops take up a light jog to catch up. Half the bar empties onto the street to watch (in-the-know regulars) along with the entire floor staff. They catch her, we all laugh and upon returning to the store, we all do a shot.

Fuck her. I only wish it could’ve been a Friday and that Atlanta didn’t have night court.